Rosemary for Remembrance
by Orangeblossom Took1
Summary: A hobbit-maid who loved Frodo since she was a child comforts him after his return from the quest.*completed*
1. Rosemary for Remembrance 1

I know I haven't finished my "blue book" story yet but it is almost done (about 2 to 3 more entries left) and this one jumped out at me. I always thought our handsome, sweet Frodo with Those Eyes had to have a lass pining for him, even if her love was unrequited. Here goes:  
  
Rosemary for Remembrance 1: How much it costs  
  
The Shire, outside Bag End spring 1420  
  
Everyone cheered Meriadoc Brandybuck and Peregrin Took, who looked dashing with their bright swords and tall ponies. All the lasses in the Shire lined the road to watch them escort their cousin to the newly restored smial and threw garlands of spring flowers at their feet. There was one lass with light brown hair and unusual green eyes whose attention was riveted by the small, wan figure who rode beside Merry and Pippin wrapped in a plain, gray cloak. She had an armful of white roses.  
  
Rosemary could barely recognize him and the sight was like a knife in her heart. He had always been quiet and a bit solemn but he always had a gentle sparkle about him, especially for children. Even at a distance she could see that that sparkle was gone. For some reason that pained her more than the physical changes she could see in him.  
  
"Mother," she whispered to the older hobbit woman next to her, "he is so terribly thin and pale."  
  
Her mother patted her on the arm and, in a sad voice, said, "I can see that, dear. I am afraid he wasn't as lucky in his adventures as old Bilbo. I also see you are still carrying a torch for him. That is a mistake. He is not the one for you and you have known that for over half your life. You are 36 now and should have had suitors."  
  
Rosemary ignored her mother and thought about how kind Frodo had been to her when she was a child. Children seemed to flock to him and thrilled to the stories and songs he made up for them. Few tweenagers were as tolerant of young children as Frodo had been. Rosemary, whose father died when she was very young, was smitten from her first sight of his blue eyes, even though she had been only ten.  
  
When she was fifteen she could no longer hide her love for him and laid her heart before him, he declined her offer with such sweetness and tenderness that she loved him all the more. She had been relieved that his friendship was still there after her foolish proclamation but that was not sufficient to counterbalance the sorrow she felt at knowing her feelings were unrequited.  
  
She remembered that day so long ago and how he gently wiped the tears off her cheeks and said, "Rosemary, you are only fifteen and will find someone who can love you with his whole heart. You deserve that, everyone does, but I am not the one for you. You are very young and shouldn't give your heart away yet."  
  
She knew he had been wrong and that there would never be anyone else. For her Frodo was and would always be the only one.  
  
Rosemary was brought back to the present by the touch of her mother's hand on her shoulder.  
  
She said, "It's time to go, dear."  
  
Rosemary replied, "I know, mother. I need one more minute."  
  
The knife in her heart twisted a little more when she saw that Sam Gamgee had to help Frodo off the pony.  
  
In a quick, impulsive motion she stepped up to him, gently placed the roses in his arms, and whispered, "thank you."  
  
She saw a shock of recognition on his face but rejoined her mother before he could say anything. She would have to visit him soon and talk but he was not well and needed to settle himself back into Bag End, so she would wait as she had always done.  
  
To be continued... 


	2. Rosemary for Remembrance 2

Rosemary for Remembrance 2: Lullaby Hobbiton spring 1420  
  
The loom's shuttle clacked briskly in the small, sunny room and a pattern began to emerge from the green and blue thread as Rosemary steeled herself for the meeting that would take placed later that day. She waited a week before sending a letter of greeting to Frodo. He sent a reply quickly and they were to have tea at Bag End today.  
  
Rosemary's mother, Autumn Whitfurrows, was embroidering golden flowers on a dress the color of fresh cream for Rosie Cotton's marriage to Sam Gamgee. She noticed Rosemary's pensive expression and said, "I wish you would give up the idea of visiting him if it is going to trouble you so much."  
  
The clacking of Rosemary's loom became more pronounced. She frowned and replied, "I am just nervous, mother. Anyway, both you and I own him more than a little worry."  
  
The older hobbit woman sighed and said, "I know and, whether they realize it or not, the whole Shire owes him. Gaffer Gamgee told me what Sam and Frodo did. I am also grateful for his kindness after your father died. I am loath to have my only child wait for him forever, though. From the looks of things, I doubt he will be marrying anyone, although there was a time when I would have said he was a better match for you than I could dare hope for."  
  
Rosemary replied, "I love you, mother, but I am of age and will do what I feel best."  
  
Autumn pointed to the blue thread strung on the loom and said, "That blue thread is worth a lot and quite gift enough, although it will be awhile before you finish it."  
  
Several hours later, Rosemary took a deep breath and knocked on Bag End's green door. She resolved that she would not burden him with her troubles and emotions and she certainly not cry. She marshaled all her resolve toward that goal.  
  
He opened the door and looked pallid but handsome as he said hello.  
  
She smiled, lifted the covered basket in her hands, and said, "I brought you some scones."  
  
They said at the kitchen and sipped tea while the scones warmed. Rosemary began the conversation.  
  
She said, "It is good to see Bag End looking so splendid. The gardens are a wonder."  
  
Frodo smiled and said, "Yes, it is. It is also good to see you again, Rosemary. Sam tells me you are a dressmaker like your mother."  
  
Replied, "I am, but I enjoy weaving more."  
  
The scones were ready and they ate them while Rosemary told Frodo stories of various funny and amusing things that happed in the Shire since he left. She did speak of the time of the occupation or anything else unhappy and not mention she had no suitors.  
  
"Rosemary," he said, "do you remember when you brought me a spice cake and a bouquet of dried lavender for my birthday?"  
  
She blushed and said, "Yes, I do. You already had a cake and the lavender crumbled."  
  
He smiled and said, "Yes, but the cake was very good and the lavender smelled wonderful, even though it had been dried several months earlier. I remembered it when I saw you brought these excellent scones and realized that you had been only twelve. You always seemed older than you actually were."  
  
She laughed and said, "I don't know whether or not that is a compliment."  
  
He said, "It most certainly is."  
  
When they finished the tea, Frodo rose to make some more but Rosemary told him she would put the water on. When she returned to the table, he had a very thoughtful look on his face.  
  
He said, "You have probably heard several versions of what happened but, since you are friends with the Gamgees, you probably have an accurate idea of what happened. You always liked my stories, would you mind if I told you a long and dark tale you already know?"  
  
Rosemary swallowed hard and said, "If you think you want to tell me, I am more than willing to listen."  
  
Much later, when the light outside was turning golden and lavender with the sunset, Frodo retired to the couch and lay down.  
  
Rosemary was silent for a time and said, "I hope that didn't cost you too much in the telling."  
  
He said, "No, but I do get tired in the evenings. Will you sing to me, Rosemary?"  
  
She sang a lullaby her mother used at bedtime when she was a child. Frodo went to sleep but she sat by him until the sunset finished and the sky deepened into the blue of dusk. She kissed his injured hand before leaving and despite her resolve two tears fell on it. 


	3. Rosemary for Remembrance 3

Rosemary for Remembrance 3: A stolen season May 1, 1420  
  
The day of Sam and Rosie's wedding dawned clear and sunny. It was cooler than usual for May and breathing in the brisk little breeze was like drinking from a fresh mountain stream. The spring blooms were at the height of their beauty. Small, star-shaped blue flowers and yellow buttercups adorned the meadows. White violets carpeted the woods and the mallorn tree was still flowering in the Party Field.  
  
Rosemary Whitfurrows was glad to see two of her childhood friends so happily married and tried not to think of how unlikely it was that she would ever get married. She refused to marry anyone but Frodo and he only wanted her friendship. Even if that were not so, he was too damaged. She could see that from the few visits she had made to Bag End but, although it caused her more pain that she thought possible, she went to see him whenever he requested her company or she could not bear to go any longer without seeing him. She took comfort in that fact that he seemed to enjoy her visits. She was mulling on this when she heard her mother's voice.  
  
"Rosemary," Autumn called, "It is time to get ready for the wedding."  
  
She replied, "I'm about to do that, mother."  
  
Rosemary stepped away from her loom and went to get her dress. It was light yellow and had a pattern of green leaves around the collar, cuffs, and hem. She brushed her hair and put it up with her best hair combs, then left for the Party Field with her mother.  
  
The Party field was resplendent with the mallorn blooms and all the hobbits in the Shire in their best, most colorful finery. Rosie looked wonderful in the dress Rosemary and Autumn made for her, which Autumn embroidered with yellow roses. After the brief ceremony, the ale and old winyards flowed. There was also no dearth of food and the cake, decorated with edible flowers like violets, was almost too beautiful to eat.  
  
Rosemary sat at a table with a glass of winyards and a piece of cake while the others danced. The band was good and, in addition to a fiddle-player, had Pippin Took singing and Merry Brandybuck playing drums. Pippin had a strong, clear tenor and, to Rosemary's surprise, sang serious as well as humorous and lively songs. Despite this, she did feel like dancing. She was about to get another glass of winyards when Frodo sat down next to her.  
  
He looked at her with assessing eyes and asked, "Why aren't you dancing, Rosemary?"  
  
She mustered a weak smile and lied, "I am not such a good dancer and would rather watch Sam and Rosie dance. Sam is blushing furiously."  
  
Frodo chuckled and said, "I know it is a large crowd, but I was hoping to see you."  
  
She cast her eyes downward and said, "I though you would be busy with your cousins or Sam."  
  
He shook is head and said, "My cousins are providing the entertainment and Sam is being twirled around by Rosie. Would you care to dance?"  
  
Rosemary looked surprised and said, "Are you strong enough for dancing?"  
  
He smiled and said, "Today is one of my better days. I can manage one or two slow songs."  
  
He signaled Pippin and took Rosemary to join the crowd on the dance floor. Pippin began a slow and beautiful ballad and they swayed gently to the music.  
  
At the end of the song, Frodo whispered, "Rosemary, I do care for you. First you were too young, then I inherited the ring, and now...now it is too late. I have little to offer you and I will have to leave before too much longer but I would love to see you whenever you can spare the time."  
  
Rosemary barely kept her voice from quavering and said, "Any time I can spare from sewing and helping mother will be yours, for as long as you are here."  
  
Throughout the summer, they were together almost every day. She brought him food and read to him. They took short walks and Rosemary continued to weave the green blanket with blue forget-me-not flowers. She knew this would not last. It was a stolen season. 


	4. Rosemary for Remembrance 4

Rosemary for Remembrance 4: The Gift  
  
Near Hobbiton September 20, 1421  
  
In a secluded glade of trees near Hobbiton, Rosemary sat on a bed of bright green moss that was soft as velvet or, as she thought to herself, as soft as Frodo's hair. She finished weaving her blanket long ago but wanted to save it for this farewell. The thought of his leaving made her sight go dim and her hands start to tremble.  
  
She told herself that she should focus on being strong for one more night. She must not, could not beg him to stay. She knew he could not, had known it from the first time she saw him make his faltering way up the stairs of Bag End. She thought back to the summer of 1420 and how her dream that it could go on forever came crashing down in the autumn and fell to the ground like so many crimson leaves. She remembered the worry on Sam's face when he came to tell her Frodo was ill again. Frodo had been so pale and thin. The color and weight he gained that summer was a memory.  
  
Rosemary closed her eyes and remembered how Frodo whispered to her in a weak voice, "I can't spend another year here, Rosemary."  
  
After that summer, they still spent much time together but were careful and no one but Sam and Rosemary's mother, Autumn, knew just how often they were with each other. She did not tell Frodo it was useless to protect her reputation because she would not accept another and, as cheerfully as possible, she assisted him in making arrangements to leave. It was sweet torture to look him in the eyes and smile when she wanted to scream, cry, and implore him to stay or take her with him. These were useless, childish fantasies. She was a woman grown and, knowing neither was possible, shoved such thoughts viciously out of her mind.  
  
She normally loved the turning of the seasons but each gold, orange, or blood-red leaf sent a chill through her heart. October was approaching and this would be there last time together. So, she sat on the moss and left the bread and cheese she brought untouched and dabbed away the silent, vagrant tears that rolled down her cheeks as she waited for him. They agreed to meet in the little glade of trees turned golden by the aging year and bordered by asters and goldenrod. She heard him coming and made her face brighten before facing him and almost shattered like glass to see those blue eyes. Except for his eyes and his still-dark hair, he looked older than his years but that skin, pale and worn as parchment, was so dear to her.  
  
She kissed his cheek and said, "Hello, Frodo. I have something for you."  
  
She reached into her pack, brought out the blanket, and spread it on the ground. The green background and the blue forget-me-nots could barely be discerned in the light of the setting sun. It was a large, beautiful blanket and made from the finest material Rosemary had available.  
  
He took her in his arms, his voice trembled and he said, "Oh, Rosemary. Thank you. If I thought I could stay, if there was any way...I know you and Sam, who are dearest to me, will be hurt by my leaving..."  
  
She could not bear to hear any more and stopped his words with a kiss. They sat down on the blanket and talked of there many times together while the sun faded and the stars came out. He told her of the elves star-eyed lady Elbereth, whose name was healing.  
  
She put her head on his shoulder and asked, "Do you remember what you said to me when my father died?"  
  
He stroked her hair and said, "Yes. I told you that part of him would always be with you, watching you from the stars with love"  
  
She took a deep breath, held him closer, and said, "I have another gift for you."  
  
They kissed again and lay down on the blanket to watch the moon. She rose over the treetops and knew their secrets but sunk into the western ocean without revealing them. 


	5. Rosemary for Remembrance 5

"But the sea is wide and I can't swim over  
  
And neither have I wings to fly." Carrickfergus, Irish traditional  
  
Rosemary for Remembrance 5: The Sea is Wide September 21-October 7 1421  
  
Rosemary rushed back home under the light of the moon after leaving Frodo that night. As soon as he was out of view, she knew had to hurry. She did not have a coherent thought, except to watch him leave for Valinor. After that, she did not know what she would do. She thought that she could not see that life had anything more to offer.  
  
When she got back to the Whitfurrows smial with it's robin's-egg-blue door, Rosemary gathered only a flask of water, some bread and cheese, and the long dagger her father used to skin coneys with when she was child. She left a note for her mother and quietly went to the paddock outside to get her pony, Star.  
  
Star was so named because of his unusual coloring. His coat was the black of midnight except for a small white patch shaped like a star on his chest. Although Star was still a young pony, Rosemary hated to take him on such a long journey, especially since she didn't know how it would end.  
  
"Star," she whispered to him even though she knew he couldn't understand, "I'm sorry. I wouldn't do this to you unless I really needed to."  
  
In answer, he huffed in her hair with his velvety nose. She took the time to add some apples and a bag of oats to her supplies.  
  
She and Star when slowly and quietly through the dark and sleepy lanes. The sky was beginning to lighten and there was a pink glow in the east. She thought they would have to go through Woody End. She would get there first, hide, and then follow them with stealth. Frodo, as much as she knew he loved her, had not asked her to come and she did not want to detract from his goodbye to Sam.  
  
Once she got past the smials of Hobbiton, Rosemary urged Star from a slow walk to a brisk trot. When they got to Woody End the next day, she hid behind some trees and underbrush and waited. She was glad she decided on this reckless course. She would never have seen elves otherwise. They were so beautiful. The one with the dark hair, kind gray eyes, and a bright ring on his finger had to be Elrond. She recognized him from Frodo's description and, for a minute, the elf-lord's gaze seemed to fall in her direction and pierce through her cover before the wizard Gandalf whispered something in his ear and both the wizard and the elf turned their attention back to Frodo. She saw the respect Elrond, the tall elf-queen Galadriel and the others gave her love and she was glad.  
  
By the time they got to the Gray Havens, her supply of bread and cheese was almost gone. She did not care. She left Star, an intelligent and obedient pony, in the woods by a little stream and slipped behind a boulder some distance from the ship and watched as Sam, Merry, and Pippin hugged Frodo and said goodbye. She closed her eyes in pain and wished she could be there.  
  
When the ship pulled away from the shore, she almost risked exposure by running toward it but was able to restrain herself. Then it was as if an immense weight pressed her into the wet sand. She lay down on the sand and did not cry but she felt as though she could not move and it was a struggle to breathe. She stayed that way as the ship disappeared into the West and was still lying prone behind the boulder when the Sun followed the ship and lit the western edge of the sea with the colors of flame.  
  
She might have stayed there forever if She hadn't felt a soft nose and a huff in her ear. Star had finally followed her onto the beach. Sam, Merry, and Pippin long ago started their return journey and the Sun was almost gone. Still dry-eyed, she hoisted herself onto Star and lay limply on his back as he picked his way off the beach and onto the road leading home.  
  
Rosemary lost track of the days. The last of her bread and cheese remained untouched. She did not even register the familiarity of the terrain when, weak from hunger and sleeplessness, she finally fell off the pony in a faint. She gathered her strength and got both herself and Star off the road.  
  
She took her father's knife out of her pack and knelt in a grove of alders with silver-green leaves. She laid the knife on her lap and looked at it for a while before taking it in her hand.  
  
She was about to draw the blade against the inside of her left arm when her right hand, which was holding the knife, was roughly grabbed. The knife clattered to the ground. She looked up and it barely penetrated the fog in her brain that it was Sam who grabbed her and his normally calm brown eyes were raging with a mix of compassion and anger.  
  
He almost shouted at her, "Rosemary! What do you think you are doing lass?"  
  
She looked at him dumbly and could barely croak out, "I don't know."  
  
He shook his head, lowered his voice and said, "You mother is frantic. Rose and I have been worried about you as well. When I got back yesterday, Autumn showed me your note and begged me to keep watch for you."  
  
She gathered her strength to utter, "I miss him."  
  
Sam gathered her in his arms and said, "I do too, Rosemary."  
  
The tears finally came and they sobbed in each other's arms for a very long time before Sam carried her to Bag End for Rose's mushroom stew.  
  
******************************************  
  
Epilogue: Iris for Hope September 22, 1425  
  
A light-haired, green-eyed hobbit-woman watched a small hobbit-lass with dark hair run along the beach. The little girl ran up to her mother and looked at her with eyes the blue-green of the sea under a summer sky.  
  
She asked, "Can I give Da his birthday gift?"  
  
Rosemary smiled and said, "Yes, Iris dear."  
  
She handed the little girl a single white rose. Iris set it in the water and they watched it float out to sea together. 


End file.
